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| Source // Wikipedia |
I've always seen the early days of first person shooters as Doom vs Duke Nukem. Why, I don't know, because there's a whole load of games I'm ignoring from those early days, but it's those two that have defined the early days of the genre for me.
Now Doom isn't a serious game, but when you stack it up against anything starring the Duke, it most certainly is a serious title. And yet the Duke Nukem series isn't really a straight up piss take of the genre like I thought it was.
It's a parody but still requires you to be alert, quick witted, and thorough in your level exploration, and my first proper look at the series is here, now, in the form of Duke Nukem 3D.
All the Duke wanted was a vacation, but no, Los Angeles is infested with aliens who have turned the police force into violent pigs. Literally violent pig-men. It's the tongue-in-cheek Duke Nukem series alright...
Fun Times
I'm playing the Megaton Edition on the PS Vita, one of the many, many versions of Duke Nukem 3D to exist, and you'll have to excuse that replay bar up the top of these screenshots, for I am an idiot for not knowing how to get rid of it, or if such a thing is possible.
Ineptitude aside, Duke Nukem 3D plays much as I expect. It's smooth and pacey and requires you to explore your surroundings from the very first room.
The streets may be drab and largely empty, but once you find a rocket launcher and blow your way through a wall into the cinema, the level design really comes into its own to show you that the Duke Nukem series isn't just about cheap kicks.
Well, I mean it is, but it's not. This is a projection of a woman doing a strip tease, but it's projected onto a screen that can be partially destroyed to lead to a secret room. Turn around and you can see the projector which is projecting the image.
That's a terrible shot of it, but trust me, it's a projector, because it's in the projector room of the cinema, at the back, looking down on all the seats where you expect to find it. Outside is the snack bar, and the toilets, where you'll find working toilets and mirrors. Another room is dedicated to a few arcade machines.
It feels like a level based on the layout of a cinema, rather than a cinema based on the layout of the level. A small difference perhaps, but it certainly feels different to the likes of Doom.
Weapons are varied, from boots to the face, pistols and shotguns all the way up to rockets and pipe bombs, and even shrink rays later on in the game, the plot of which is... probably absurd. To be fair, it's not made obvious, and you'll have to read around and pay attention to know what's going on. Aliens invade, gotta save the world, the usual.
Anyway, those weapons will need ammo (except for your boots) and your body will need health and armour and your screen will turn as red as the screens of modern first person shooters, but eventually you'll get through to the end of the level and proceed to the next, with a few levels comprising an episode, and a few episodes making up the game.
I was leisurely on the first level, certainly, getting used to the way things worked, exploring the stage, interacting with light switches and blowing up fire extinguishers - the levels are highly interactive. The second level would show better stats I'm sure...
Frustration
Except that it didn't. Good Lord, it didn't. I was struggling to get off the street. If the first Pigman didn't do me in with his shotgun, the second - coming in on a flying shark hoverbike thing - definitely would. In the rare case where he didn't, though, his mate hiding in a room around the corner did, and after too many lives lost - on the easiest difficulty, naturally - I had had enough.
The PS Vita controls were getting to me. It was certainly not designed for first person shooters, even with two analogue nubs. My aim - even with some level of auto aim, apparently - was off, meaning my ammo count was pitiful, and if I took too much damage from one enemy, and they didn't drop anything of use, be it a weapon or body armour, then I was essentially just waiting to die.
This edition does continually save your progress such that you can rewind time to a point where you are comfortable carrying on from, but even that wasn't enough to save me from quitting.
Final Word
Duke Nukem 3D is much better than I imagined it to be. It's still gunning for controversies and throws around the kind of humour adolescent boys get a kick out of like it's going out of fashion, but the level design looks top notch and with that comes an attention to detail that you don't often see from games, and certainly don't expect from games that apparently exist just to mock other games.
I've not played enough of Duke Nukem 3D. I don't want to go back to the PS Vita port, so I'll have to look into one of the many PC releases, I think. A video has been playing in the background, mostly for the ambience and sound effects, and the occasional quote from the Duke. There's no character like him, really, is there?
Should you play it? Definitely. Especially if you've avoided it because you think Doom or Quake or whathaveyou are the better games. They may well be, but for all his troubles in recent years, the Duke should be let out to save the world once in a while. Even if he has to tip strippers while doing so.
Note: Tipping strippers is completely optional.
Fun Facts
There was, at one point, the option to switch between first and third person viewpoints. Having seen the way the third person works in the replay feature of the PS Vita Megaton Edition, I'm glad this wasn't in the final release...
Duke Nukem 3D, developed by 3D Realms, first released in 1996.
Version played: Duke Nukem 3D: Megaton Edition, PlayStation Vita, 2015.
Version watched: DOS, 1996 (ToxicBarrel)