Ugh. It's here again. Not only on the 1001 list, but all I'm bloody hearing in 2020 is Animal bloody Crossing. While everyone, apparently, is enjoying New Horizons (sadly not the space probe, but the Nintendo Switch title), I'm here seeing what I've read was the turning point of the Animal Crossing series; the moment of its explosion in popularity, for reasons unknown, though highly likely to be due to the portability of the Nintendo DS.
I am, of course, sadly, talking about Animal Crossings: Wild World.
Frustrations
Wild World starts in the back of a cab, with a nosey driver who thinks he's a pirate or something. The skies are grey and miserable. They reflect how I feel about having to load up Wild World.
The chatter regards the time and date, as well as our name. And that's when Wild World annoyed me. Absolutely suckered me in, in fact.
Fond of the name Frank? Well, actually, Kapp'n, I wouldn't say I'm fond, no. There's more to it than that. Which is the most appropriate dialogue choice here? Well, "That's not it", clearly.
Oh. No. That was Wild World asking me to confirm whether my name was Frank. It wasn't starting a conversation. Why did I think for even a second that I was having a conversation with a cabbie? What is Animal bloody Crossing doing to me?
The clouds disperse and we arrive at the Town Hall of Hell. It's not an original town name, I'm sure, but it's what I feel. Luckily, Pelly here is nice and jolly working in Hell, so it can't be that bad.
Tom Nook has a house set aside for me. I'm expected in Hell. What does that say about me, I wonder?
I thought finding my own house would be a doddle, but it turns out that the map doesn't display a keyhole to represent a locked door. No, that keyhole is, obviously, me. It's a person. It's clearly not, is it?
Home, sweet home. I steal everything that isn't bolted down and leave. Why would I want to stay here, in Hell?
And here we are once again. The formula for Animal Crossing titles is the same, no matter the setting. Work to pay off Tom Nook, work to buy pretty things from Tom Nook, work to pay for a larger house Tom Nook happens to be selling. What makes this appealing to players? No, seriously, what? Psychologists, chip in here, please.
Drop it, Nook. What do I have to do to pay off my shed? Plant some flowers like last time?
Oh, for the love of...
No, Nook, I haven't. I don't want to. The less social interaction I have with animals, the better. Just put me to work and let me get on with it. Why drag this out any longer than it needs to be? Why introduce distractions into the proceedings?
Right, we've said hello to the Tormentor of Hell or whatever, let's get back to work.
No, I haven't, and you know I haven't. I won't. I'm out.
Final Word
If you think all of this is awfully familiar to the last attempt I had at playing an Animal bloody Crossing game, you'd be right. Save for the location and the graphics, it is an identical start to the game. It bored me the first time I saw it, what makes you think I'll like seeing it again, Nintendo? The fact that this time it's portable?
Why does this need two entries on the 1001 list if they're the same game, essentially? There better not be any more. Sure, being able to chip away at whatever fascinating things you do in Wild World while waiting on a bus is a plus for all those people who desperately need their fix, but that's just not me.
I don't know why people go mad for this rubbish but good for them. I go mad for what other people consider rubbish, so are we any different? Like Wild World and Animal Crossing, no, we're not.
Let's just stick to our own rubbish, shall we?
Fun Facts
You can apparently draw constellations which will appear in the sky when it's night time. That's not too bad. Shame it's a feature in an Animal Crossing game, though.
Animal Crossing: Wild World, developed by Nintendo EAD, first released in 2005.
Version played: Nintendo DS, 2006, via emulation.