I like Marvel. I like (the characters I recognise from) Capcom. I like fighting games. I should very much like to be taken for a ride in Marvel vs. Capcom 2: New Age of Heroes, a fighting game that pits Marvel vs Capcom.
Who fancies Captain America vs Guile? Magneto vs M.Bison? Ryu vs Ken? They're all here, ready to team up with two other fighters to get stuck in, three on three, in a game that is so focused on the flashy moves that my capture methods can't even keep up with them, but I'll try my best anyway.
I'm ready for some button mashing.
Fun Times
I'm playing the PlayStation 2 port of MvC2, released a few years after its initial arcade launch, and it opens with an attract screen, of sorts. It flashes up - in a blink and you'll miss it fashion - key features about the game, and runs through the casts of characters, half of which are silhouetted until you unlock them, urging you to get into the game and do so already.
I don't recognise a great many from the Capcom side of things, I must admit, and we all know what Ryu and his Street Fighter pals do, so I'm going to start with a Marvel trio and see what happens.
Each character has a number of assist type options based on who they are, one would imagine, and it's these assist moves that'll come into play in the game when things get a bit hairy. I'm a complete idiot, however, so I've just picked what sounded good and will inevitably wing it. I don't even know how to do these assists yet.
Hopefully, we won't need to bother with the details too much and can use what we've learned over the years of fighting games what works and what doesn't. We'll probe out weaknesses, we'll test the range of our move-sets, we'll play it smart...
Holy balls, where did that come from? We've started, I see, through swollen eyes and a broken nose, after an onslaught like that. I can't recall characters darting around the screen of a fighting game this fast in my life, and I'm not even playing on Turbo mode here.
Characters have the usual line up of attack options - kicks, punches, some throws here and there, a ranged attack if that's the kind of person you are, all of the light, medium and heavy variety - and just as soon as I get to use them, I'll figure out which each button does.
Spiderman once came out of nowhere, webbed up Rogue for some free hits then dashed out of my way, before a giant ape utterly melted my capture software with... something... I had no idea what was technically going on, save for teammates coming and going for seconds at a time as I tried to knock our Rogue.
With Wolverine in need of some recovery time, I swapped in Spiderman - somehow, because I'm yet to get the controls down at this point in my playtime - who stretched his way across the screen like a cartoon.
He wasn't brilliantly successful, but it's early days. While Spidey was in the action, Wolverine (my Wolverine) was free to slowly heal up, ready for a return or an assist at a later date. Assuming I found those buttons sharpish.
By this point, I'd gotten a little more of an idea of what was going on. A meter at the bottom usually refers to a fancy looking powerful attack, and that usually means I'll never be able to pull them off knowingly. It's my goal to do something super using that meter, as it is in any fighting game.
The clock was ticking down. Wolverine and Rogue eventually bit the dust, and Spiderman was close behind, but he lasted long enough to help break the tie at the end of the round - the healthiest team wins. On to the next stage of whatever competition we're in we go.
The second fight was much the same. I had worked out that you can call in for assists from either of your teammates, who do something or another before disappearing. If you manage to catch your opponent's teammate in the middle of their assist, you can get some extra damage in on them, but I often found them too quick to register what was going on and avoid a hit, let alone get in a position to dish one back out.
Stage three and things were getting difficult. I wish I could do a fancy 15 hit combo. I've clearly got all the energy for it, and then some. Just need to find the right inputs...
Aha! Eat that, Scotty boy.
Frustrations
Everything went downhill in stage four. This Egyptian dude, Anakaris, could do no wrong when it came to attacking me, and getting assists like that from Hayato is just rubbing salt into my wounds. Whatever strategy should have been in play wasn't anywhere near my head. It is at this point where you simply need to know what you're doing, and I didn't.
A quick hop into the training mode and a switch to using the analogue stick for directional inputs meant that I had finally found how to pull off a swanky move, which appears to be a half circle, somewhere, and the R1 or R2 buttons.
To be sure, I had no idea, but something vaguely like that would serve me well. With that in mind, it was time to get the Street Fighter boys into the competition.
Further Fun Times
Yeeeaahhh, that's what I want to see. I can't actually see it, what with all the movement, bright lights and, after the fact, compression from the attempted capture of the action, but I pulled off a special move and it felt alright.
I was even pulling them off with some regularity, so I was definitely onto something. Advanced button mushing, we'll call it, because it sure wasn't skill.
There isn't a whole lot of time to see the sprites, but they seem to run from the basic to the extravagant. Some characters just look plain and uninspired, compared to the more flamboyant, expressive ones. Cyclops looks dull, for example, but Spiderman is pulled straight from a cartoon.
The sound effects are a similar story. Wolverine's snikts and schwings are neat, and Cyclops' 'Optic Blast! Optic Blast! Optic Blast!' is ridiculous. In fact, Cyclops really isn't coming out of this one very well, is he? I don't even know why I picked him.
Stage three for my second attempt was the obstacle that couldn't be overcome. The first two opponents, Marrow and Ruby Heart, kicked my arse in their own ways before Ryu came along and does what Ryu does best...
Oh. Their Ryu, not mine...
Final Word
So, I'd found my difficulty wall - roundabout the middle - which wasn't bad, I suppose. It seems these types of games ramp the difficulty up pretty darn fast, whereas MvC2 seemed to have a smoother curve in that regards.
There were some characters I just couldn't find a nice way to deal with, and some I just couldn't effectively use. I struggled with Zangief, for example, owing to how lumbering he was. Looked awesome suplexing everyone though, when I managed to pull it off.
I haven't tried the Turbo mode to see how much more mayhem gets unleashed upon my screen. I assume it ups the speed only, but I found it fast enough, thank you very much. When attacking, at least - these guys and girls are fighters, not walkers.
If you want more characters, you've got to work for it. You'll get points by completing (or merely playing, in my case) the various modes on offer, and these can be cashed in at the shop.
I don't know who Captain Commando is, and Sabretooth isn't cool enough to care about. They were all that was on offer, so I assume the shop rotates its stock after a while? Not the best, if you're after a character that isn't available in the default line up, but you've got to have something to keep players engaged, I suppose.
And I was engaged... but for the characters, half of whom I can't see or play as yet. Unless I get the PlayStation 3 port, apparently. Well, I'll keep that in mind.
Will I play some more Marvel vs. Capcom 2? Probably. As I say, the appeal for me is the characters. I can't see everything they do and don't know how to get them to pull off the rest, but it is entertaining enough to get into a fight and try.
Would multiplayer make things even better? Of course. Humans have a way of playing against themselves that AI just can't manage, and gloating over a computer is silly, especially when it can so easily kick your arse in the very next match.
It's not perfect, but nothing is. Give it a go.
Fun Facts
After releasing Street Fighter II Turbo HD Remix, Capcom said that MvC2 was the fans' most requested title for a re-release, and in 2009 they'd have it on the Xbox 360 and PS3. There's a lot of love for this game that I just don't know about, it seems.
Marvel vs. Capcom 2: New Age of Heroes, developed by Capcom, first released in 2000.
Version played: PlayStation 2, 2002, via emulation.