I am so close to writing "It's more of the same, move along" and just call it a day, but apparently Guitar Hero II is more than that. It marks the point at which the series showed the music world that these kind of games are going to stay, and at the same time represented the series peak before the developers split off to do Rock Band while the Guitar Hero name was dragged around the world.
Or something. I'm not really interested. One clacky plastic instrument functions the same as another, does it not?
Let's get this over with.
Frustrations
As before, I'm emulating Guitar Hero II because I've more sense than money, and it comes with a warning about the new influx of HDTVs, and the possible need for you to tinker with some calibration settings to give you the best experience. Wouldn't want to clack at the wrong time now, would you?
It's an important point made more complicated in emulation, as slowdown and dropped frames are quite regular. I had playable settings, for sure, but not perfect ones.
Again, I'm going to steer clear of the career mode and head to the section of the game that just lets the folks do what they came here to do: 'play' along to their favourite tracks. Unfortunately, the setlist of available songs in this outing has been absolutely slashed, pushing players towards success in the career mode to unlock more.
I'll only be playing the ones I recognise, and in increasing difficultly for the hell of it, all on the controller with the shoulder button claw grip that will not last long at all.
You know the drill. Hit the notes at the right time, hold them for the right length, the more you get right in a row the higher your multiplier, the higher the score. You're not here to enjoy your favourite songs, you're here to perfect them. It's the only way you'll hear them sound close to the original, after all.
After you've clacked your way through the song, you'll be presented with your stats. How many notes did this musically inept individual get right?
Eh, enough. Onto the next song, and the next difficulty level. Strutter, KISS. Didn't know I knew it until the preview started playing. I only know it from video games.
If you rock out well enough, you'll unlock your Star Power, where you can turn a section of the song into a little more of a show-offy moment. You go off on your guitar a little, the audience claps along, the song generally, briefly, gets a little more personal between you're ridiculous looking avatar and the audiences.
Not that you'll be looking at these models, of course. No, your focus is, as ever, on the bottom half of the screen and little else. Don't worry. You're not missing much. See?
I'd say Nirvana are up next, but they're not. The vast majority of tracks in Guitar Hero II continue to be covers. To be fair to the artists behind them, I didn't know some of these were covers, but that's because I don't listen to KISS regularly. I don't listen to Nirvana regularly, either, but I've heard enough to know that this sure ain't Kurt, and that covers can't touch the original.
I end up missing notes and butchering the song anyway, sadly. Guess I'll just have to dig out the CD if I want to hear it properly. But I read that Guitar Hero II was a kind of turning point, where the music industry took more notice.
Supposedly, this is the game where it all kicked off. This was proof that, in the future, anyone could be turned into a rhythm game with a giant plastic peripheral. Think of the possibilities. Or not, because you know them all. It ends with The Beatles. I know it does because it's on this bloody 1001 list. Why wouldn't it be? You absolutely must play a rhythm game with plastic Beatle-based instruments before you die. Did you know that? Thank goodness I'm tackling this list by my own rules.
Where was I?
My march up the difficulty levels wasn't a steady curve but a jagged spike. Hard and Expert were as hard and expert as you can imagine, notes coming at me too fast to register with my own eyes, let alone coordinate with my fingers. I didn't want to listen to Not The Police failing to play anyway.
Final Word
Half an hour after beginning, I was done. I'd had my fill of clacking along to cover songs and left, not satisfied, but a little achy. Would it be easier to hold a guitar-shaped controller for extended periods of time, than to claw your fingers around the shoulder buttons? Yes, probably. Will you ever see me do such a thing? Noooooooooope.
I don't care for these games. I don't see the point. I continue to not see the point. Great, more and more musicians are lending their own recordings to them all, but what's the end result? They get absolutely butchered by incompetent players and sound nothing like they should.
But people are entertained by this. Amazing. Long may it continue, and long may I not be a part of it.
Fun Facts
To reinforce the notion that this was the game where things turned, it was the success of the first Guitar Hero that showed bands that their music would be treated with care and respect, not merely used to cash in on their fame. Bands wanted to be a part of this series now. Product placement is everywhere if you know what on Earth the products even are. The world went mental.
Guitar Hero II, developed by Harmonix, first released in 2006.
Version played: PlayStation 2, 2006, via emulation.