Can't we solve our differences at range?
There are many reasons for a list such as the 1001 list to exist. Highlighting technological achievements, for example. Uncovering forgotten and overlooked gems. Introducing players to new and unforgettable experiences, even when they wish they'd rather forget about the weird first-person beat 'em up set in what must be the most unusual setting under the sun that is Zeno Clash.
Sorry, that might spoil what I think of this game ever so slightly...
Frustrations
Zeno Clash is weird, let's just hammer that fact home. The introduction video above tells us very little that we can make sense of, save for that the game takes place in what appears to be some kind of advanced hunter-gatherer tribal sort of setting.
Through blurred vision and blinking eyes, we're supposedly told that we've just bombed the Father-Mother, the leader of this place. Is that a good thing?
In our dazed state, we dream or otherwise have visions of a guy called... something or other, who seems to say that we failed in our attempts to do whatever it is we're doing on account of still being alive, whereas he succeeded in his attempts to do the same thing because he is dead.
'Say' is probably the wrong word. Is 'Splutter' any better? He isn't just chewing gravel, but inhaling it as well. Subtitles are a must.
He acts as our guide for the tutorial, and if you can't tell from the subtitles and button prompts, Zeno Clash is built in the Source engine, so it plays very much like Half-Life and the like, only instead of guns you've got fists.
The only first-person combat I'm more than familiar with in video games is that of Skyrim, where you tended not to use your fists if you could help it, and Mirror's Edge, where the whole point of the game was to run away from fights where possible, rather than engaging in them, because getting into a fight was rubbish.
First-person fisticuffs in video games just doesn't cut it, but Zeno Clash is going in hard, throwing everything behind the belief that it has a system that works.
To give it credit, it does seem quite simple. Light and heavy attacks on the mouse, blocking on the space bar, grabs when a target is stunned and so on, and these moves change according to whether you're running around like a headless chicken, or have actively focused on a target and are strafing around them in a proper fighting stance.
The problem, for me, is that it just isn't simple. Dodging an incoming attack involves holding the block button, making sure you have enough stamina, and pressing left or right depending on the situation. For some reason, pressing A or D while holding down the space bar threw me off completely, to the point where I wondered if I'd ever get out of the tutorial.
Hopes for a good game were slipping fast...
Apparently we are waking up, yes, and into this fantasy world that's unlike anything you've ever seen, certainly in a 3D game like this. Why is it so unlike anything you've seen? Let's just let the action unfold a little, shall we?
Where to begin?
Fighting three beings is nothing new to us in video gaming. Focus on one, knock them down, switch over to another. Piece of cake. What is new to us is having absolutely no way of knowing what the other two combatants are doing should they be off-screen, and given your field of view and huge arms, they will be.
I don't know any details about whether they'll attack differently if they're off-screen versus on, but I know for sure that there were plenty of moments where, after punching one target in the face, I'd know exactly where the next target was on account of them punching me in the back of the head.
You can argue that this is a perfect representation of the chaos of unarmed combat, and how important situational awareness is, yada yada yada. I can argue that it just sucks. Might not be as strong of an argument, but it's the one that Zeno Clash is bringing to mind. It just sucks.
It doesn't get any better when it introduces guns, either. You'd think a Source engine game would be able to do guns, but these are pathetic. They probably shouldn't be as good as your fists, what with Zeno Clash priding itself on the use of unarmed combat. They're cobbled together with some kind of in-world technology that looks like it ought to break apart upon use too, so they have that going for them as well.
Even with infinite ammo and pretty quick reload speeds, they're just a pain in the arse to use. I've seen deadlier staplers.
Fight number two, and you'll note that I'm not using my guns. I was using them, as much as possible, even aiming for this guys head, but again, deadlier staplers. So far as I can tell, I was walloped so hard from a punch or a kick, or possibly a grenade of some kind, that they flew out of my hands and are on the floor somewhere.
Again, you might argue that that is realistic. It can happen to your opponents, too, so you can take their weapon and use it against them... but it'll be a crappy weapon, so it's perhaps best left on the floor.
What else is realistically presented in Zeno Clash? Well, whenever you get hit your camera wobbles. If you're pushed back you look up to the sky, if you're blindsided you stagger to the side. Even if you wind up a strong punch of your own, your view is pulled back before being thrust forward, hopefully towards an enemy.
As you'll note by glancing at the health bars, that wasn't really the case in this fight.
Final Word
Fifteen minutes. I've not bounced off a game as fast as I bounced off Zeno Clash in a long time, but bounce off it I did, never to return.
You can find videos and reviews of Zeno Clash that praise how it delivers a combat system that allows for differing approaches, or that puts you into a scene in a way that even other first-person games can't seem to do, but these views do not match my own.
I can see how the combat could be rewarding, but even if I managed to overcome my problems with it, even if I knuckled down and practised, I'd then be left in this bizarro world whose story seems to involve me failing to kill a bird-man and getting attacked by crazy people out for revenge.
It is a world I don't particularly want to be in, staring characters I don't care about, running around in a very distinct game engine that is put to work doing something it probably wasn't designed to do. I mean, congratulations to the developers for getting a game out of their ideas, it's just not one I want any part of.
Am I wrong? Is Zeno Clash the best that first-person fistfighting ever got? I don't think I'll lose any sleep if I am.
Fun Facts
Inspiration for the art style included the works of Hieronymus Bosch and John Blanche. One of those artists is well known in the world of Warhammer 40k, and I'm not going to tell you which.
Zeno Clash, developed by ACE Team, first released in 2009.
Version played: PC, 2009.