What the hell kind of a title is Eets: Hunger. It's Emotional? What does that even mean? I know we're no stranger to weird titles, but this one must take the biscuit. And proceed to eat it, presumably.
The 1001 list has this down as a game for the PlayStation Portable, but not only does Wikipedia beg to differ, it even goes so far as to say that it was pitched as a title for the Nintendo DS and PSP, and failed to land on either.
Promising start, no?
Frustrations
I found a trial version of Eets somewhere online and fired it hope to see what on Earth it was. Apparently, it's a cross between Lemmings and The Incredible Machine, so already the uphill battle to win me over has turned into a cliff.
You are some invisible force determined to guide Eets, a giant-headed rabbit thing, to a puzzle piece somewhere in the level. You do so by clicking on various bits and bobs in the stage to get them to do this and that and watch as the helpless Eets is thrown, pestered, and prompted towards the prize.
Take these whales for example. Click on them and they suck in whatever is nearby, shooting it out of their blowholes.
Do you think anyone would have worked that out without being told about it? Did you think that whale was even interactable? Eets looks like a Flash game, but with none of the nostalgia tied to actual Flash games, and therefore looks awful, rather than charming.
Take this next level for an example. A whale inhales a block of jelly, which explodes upon impact with a bush in much the same vein as a poor Worm would in Worms. This allows Eets to move forward a little more - he just bumped off the bush before - and automatically jump over the gap (yeah, they don't tell you that, either), where you can then chain together some whale cannons towards the puzzle piece.
Even the end of the level graphics don't give a damn about this game. Look at that sarcastic bastard. He doesn't mean that thumbs up. He doesn't want to be here. I don't want to be here, and we're only a few puzzle pieces into the trial version of Eets, for goodness sake.
It's not all interacting with the stage in the right order. Eets will have you position some of the interactable stuff beforehand, so not only do you have to navigate the level in the right order, you have to put things in the right place as well.
A mushroom that Eets eats turns him into a scaredy-cat who doesn't jump over gaps. A... thing... can shoot at him which gets him riled up and angry again, this time determined to jump gaps. And Lord knows what - if anything - that cactus does. I gave up before finding out.
Final Word
Barely five minutes after I installed Eets, I was reaching for the uninstall button. It was awful. I already dislike Lemmings-like gameplay and this dopey looking thing is doing absolutely nothing to convince me to stick around. His varied friends aren't either.
Sometimes games can be wacky and get away with it. Eets looks like it raided Clip-Art. There is nothing about this game that is appealing, and yet somehow, I'm reading that achievements and the challenge of solving the puzzles had players continuing to gobble up the puzzle pieces. How? Why? Who?
You'll know, from these screenshots, whether Eets: Hunger. It's Emotional is right for you. You may even know from the name. I'd avoid it too.
Usually, even for a game I dislike, I'd say that I was glad to have played it. Not the case here. I could have tried and failed another game of DEFCON, but no, I thought this would be a more interesting use of my time...
Fun Facts
This thing even failed to get to Steam in the early days. Just think about that. Didn't take long for it to get on there eventually, though, but still.
Eets: Hunger. It's Emotional, developed by Klei Entertainment, first released in 2006.
Version played: PC, 2006.